Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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