were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
