did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
