My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
