thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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