Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
