We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize