Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
