I wish I could teleport
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
