just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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