I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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