It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Is this like a preordered booty call?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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