Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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