and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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