the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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