I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
