Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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