better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Blood and glitter go together right?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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