Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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