I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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