hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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