i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
