didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
