talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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