In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize