Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
