why didn't you poke me back
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
