We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
