my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
