You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
