Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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