so that wasnt chicken after all
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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