I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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