their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize