Dual....:-)
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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