Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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