are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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