I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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