David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
