i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
A+ Viking dick
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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