just come out here and I will go home with you...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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