wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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