The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
