So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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