Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
it was like his penis was on wheels.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
