I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
