im gay
i know
yea but for you.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
