fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
