please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
