I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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